FYI–I’ve decided to become great in God’s kingdom. Like St.Therese of Lisieux, “I don’t want to be a saint by halves,” I want it all. When I go to heaven, I want God to say “Well done, they good and faithful servant,” and then lead me to my rewarded place near the throne. And while on earth, I want to be on the absolute cutting edge of what God is doing in ministry and “perfect as your heavenly father is perfect” in my private life.
Sounds sacrilegious, doesn’t it? Or at least obnoxious. It was uncomfortable even writing about this much spiritual ambition, a phrase which often seems oxymoronic. Check out the Bible–isn’t it replete with verses extolling humility and putting down pride? At best we’re called to stumble onto greatness through grace; in fact, the more we want it, the less we’ll get it.
So I guess I was wrong–God must want me to settle. If I actually make it to heaven He’d like to greet me with “partially well done, my marginal at best servant,” no doubt wanting to be alone by the throne with the rest cowering by the Pearly Gates. And I imagine He’ll use His Whac-a-Mole method for my forays into ministry and growth–shoving my head back down whenever it assertively comes to the light.
That doesn’t sound or feel right either. So I guess balance is needed. Maybe we should adjust our lives like the climate system in a high rise building: when the temperature gets too warm (i.e. we start to get overly ambitious), the air conditioning kicks on to bring the heat down; when the temperature gets too cold (i.e. we start to underachieve), the heating kicks in to warm it back up.
But that sounds like a recipe for mediocrity. What’s the right perspective here?
“…..but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant.”
Matthew 20:26
Many of us are well acquainted with this profound verse, which communicates the simple but radical idea that humbling yourself in service is a means to greatness. Not sticking out in the crowd, not looking better or sounding better or being better, not dominating or belittling or bloviating, no, the way to the top is from the bottom. It is part of Christ’s rhetoric of reversal (“the first shall be last”), a paradoxical communication of deeper truths.
But when focusing on the servant aspect of this verse, we sometimes miss the call to greatness, the end to which service is a means. Just as the verse extolling us to “love our neighbor as ourselves” also shows the importance of loving oneself, “whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant” seems to lend credence to the idea that greatness is something to be sought, albeit by the path of service.
There are obvious caveats here. One is our looking to be great in God’s kingdom, which of course has its own priorities and value system based on humility and holiness. And this greatness isn’t to be competitive vis a vis others; Websters may define greatness as “markedly superior in character, quality or skill” but our superiority in Christ is only vis a vis the schlepper we could’ve been. And of course grace will play the defining part in how and where this greatness is manifest.
Where I think we get uncomfortable is the idea that God wants us to desire something, especially greatness. Does God want us to want to use the talents He’s given us, want to love others and make a difference in our world, want to help justice roll down? Well, yeah. Sure He wants us to have the humility to know where the power comes from, but as far as humility goes, he seems to condemn false humility along with the lack thereof.
So is the desire of being great and a saint in heaven and on earth a bad thing? I don’t think so, and we do our God, our world and ourselves an injustice by striving and desiring for too little. We may be nothing without God, but with Him we can join the “I don’t want to be a saint by halves” Saint Therese in saying “in spite of my littleness, I can hope to be a saint.”
Sounds sacrilegious, doesn’t it? Or at least obnoxious. It was uncomfortable even writing about this much spiritual ambition, a phrase which often seems oxymoronic. Check out the Bible–isn’t it replete with verses extolling humility and putting down pride? At best we’re called to stumble onto greatness through grace; in fact, the more we want it, the less we’ll get it.
So I guess I was wrong–God must want me to settle. If I actually make it to heaven He’d like to greet me with “partially well done, my marginal at best servant,” no doubt wanting to be alone by the throne with the rest cowering by the Pearly Gates. And I imagine He’ll use His Whac-a-Mole method for my forays into ministry and growth–shoving my head back down whenever it assertively comes to the light.
That doesn’t sound or feel right either. So I guess balance is needed. Maybe we should adjust our lives like the climate system in a high rise building: when the temperature gets too warm (i.e. we start to get overly ambitious), the air conditioning kicks on to bring the heat down; when the temperature gets too cold (i.e. we start to underachieve), the heating kicks in to warm it back up.
But that sounds like a recipe for mediocrity. What’s the right perspective here?
“…..but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant.”
Matthew 20:26
Many of us are well acquainted with this profound verse, which communicates the simple but radical idea that humbling yourself in service is a means to greatness. Not sticking out in the crowd, not looking better or sounding better or being better, not dominating or belittling or bloviating, no, the way to the top is from the bottom. It is part of Christ’s rhetoric of reversal (“the first shall be last”), a paradoxical communication of deeper truths.
But when focusing on the servant aspect of this verse, we sometimes miss the call to greatness, the end to which service is a means. Just as the verse extolling us to “love our neighbor as ourselves” also shows the importance of loving oneself, “whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant” seems to lend credence to the idea that greatness is something to be sought, albeit by the path of service.
There are obvious caveats here. One is our looking to be great in God’s kingdom, which of course has its own priorities and value system based on humility and holiness. And this greatness isn’t to be competitive vis a vis others; Websters may define greatness as “markedly superior in character, quality or skill” but our superiority in Christ is only vis a vis the schlepper we could’ve been. And of course grace will play the defining part in how and where this greatness is manifest.
Where I think we get uncomfortable is the idea that God wants us to desire something, especially greatness. Does God want us to want to use the talents He’s given us, want to love others and make a difference in our world, want to help justice roll down? Well, yeah. Sure He wants us to have the humility to know where the power comes from, but as far as humility goes, he seems to condemn false humility along with the lack thereof.
So is the desire of being great and a saint in heaven and on earth a bad thing? I don’t think so, and we do our God, our world and ourselves an injustice by striving and desiring for too little. We may be nothing without God, but with Him we can join the “I don’t want to be a saint by halves” Saint Therese in saying “in spite of my littleness, I can hope to be a saint.”
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